Raised as I was in that confusing ‘mess’ of post war American suburban materialism I learned well how to hate myself.
I learned to think that everyone was better than me.
I learned that whatever blessings I had were nothing in comparison to those titans of opulence, the Rockefeller’s, the movie stars, the celebrities of the day.
I learned that the only logical position to be in was in being someone else, somewhere else, and something else.
And never, ever, not even for one single second to give up the fight for a Better & Bigger Self.
Basically, I learned to hate life and everything about it.
And to especially hate myself.
But the good thing, (heck the great thing) about hate is that it hurts.
Like an acid, only much much stronger, hate eats everything in its path.
And just as that horrible corrosive hatred was about to burn through to the bottom of sensitive parts, it dawned on me that there had to be a better way, a way with a lot less agony, a way that works with the World and not against it, a way of Harmony and perhaps a bit of Joy.
Indeed the way back has been all that and more.
And what’s fun about it is that along the way, I’ve had the chance to re-examine the internalized voices and ideas of my materialistic insane life.
Tachlis, I’ve learned how to hang out in the Beautiful silence of The Soul (there is only one soul after all and we all share it).
In that silence, I’ve learned to sit with anyone.
Pull up a chair!
Have a seat!
There’s plenty of room!